NAR-ANON FAMILY GROUPS 12 STEP PROGRAM FOR THE FAMILIES & FRIENDS OF A LOVED ONE WITH AN ADDICTION
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WELCOME TO THE NAR-ANON FAMILY OF NEW YORK REGION
In the NAR-ANON program, we learn that drug addiction is a disease that we are not responsible for. The drug user needs help and so do we. We discovered many of our efforts to control or change the situation were often actually enabling or encouraging this person to continue a self-destructive pattern. It has been a great relief to learn more effective ways of coping with this situation, while at the same time gaining some peace of mind, hope, and help for a better way to live. You will hear others, who are going through similar problems, talk about how they cope and find recovery. NAR-ANON can bring new insight about our attitudes, behavior and emotions. It can be the source for regaining our own sanity and well-being. We learn that addiction is a family disease and we need recovery too. There are no charges or obligations as NAR-ANON is a non-profit organization. We are not affiliated with any treatment program or hospitals and do not discriminate about any persons race, creed, sexual orientation, religion or lack of religion. The weekly meetings are held regularly throughout the year. Your attendance is welcomed without prior arrangements. You will not be urged to participate in the group discussions, but may join in if you wish or ask questions before and after the meeting. We do UNDERSTAND how you feel. Reprinted with permission of Nar-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 23110 Crenshaw Blvd. Suite A Torrance, CA 90505 (310)-534-8188 or (800)-477-6291 WSO Website
Before arriving at my first meeting I was mentally, spiritually and physically bankrupt as a result of someone else’s addiction. I learned I was an addict who was addicted to my loved one. I never heard of Nar-Anon and even when I walked through the doors of my first meeting I still wasn’t sure this was for me. I weighed my options after the first meeting and decided at this point I truly had nothing else to lose because the addict had already caused the wreckage I was now living in.
Before attending the meetings, I walked and ran around with a big "S" on my chest like I was my addict’s Superhero trying to fix every problem the addict was causing in both of our lives. I was loaded with many emotions such as fear, anger, insecurity, self-doubt, low self-esteem, hatred etc. I would silently cry myself to sleep and avoid family and friends whenever possible. I would try to communicate with the addict and explain what I was going through and why the using needed to stop and when that wouldn’t work I resorted to threatening, screaming, manipulating, lying, etc. none of which stopped him from using. Drug Addiction is a beast that I attempted to battle until Nar-Anon showed me the error of my ways. You cannot get in the ring and go to battle in a fight against someone or something that’s not yours.
After the first meeting, I was glad to know I was not alone in suffering with the disease of addiction in a family member. I was told to keep coming back and to show up for a minimum of six meetings and don’t make any rash decisions. Those suggestions were easy enough to follow so I did them and I am still showing up because this program is for me not the addict in my life. Only after attending several meetings was I able to recognize the role I played in my addict’s addiction and gratefully over time with the help of this 12-Step Program I learned to Love (Let Others Voluntarily Evolve) my addict again although the using has stopped and restarted several times over. I also had to learn to detach with love and separate the disease of addiction from the addict in order for us to get along which we do now as a result of my participation in program. We...the wife, daughter, sister, mother, brother, son, father, friend of the addict can find help in the Nar-Anon 12-Step Program for ourselves if we give it a try."
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